The BASH - Pub Olympics....

When I first arrived back at The Pub on Saturday morning, not surprisingly Al had set up shop already and begun to work on his Pub Olympic team roster. Now that I was there with him, “The Enemy” was in da’ house. We had a lot of laughs discussing everyone’s strengths and which event each specific blogger should be competing in. Now I knew there was no way brudder Carson and DonKaaa were not playing Darts! Al had watched them desimate me 3 games in a row earlier on. Not 3 straight games either! They played 3 games……. And let me keep my score continous from the first, right through to the third ! Carson is one of the best Dart players in Ontario. DonKaaa has been playing a lot more lately and is pretty much a natural at anything he picks up. Team Otis would need to bring their “A” game for certain. DonKaaa was also a Galaga junkie back in the day, and after watching him destroy the machine on Friday afternoon, I knew Al would be putting him into that spot as well.

With the whooooosh of a drive by, EVY ran through the bar area and said something that sounded like hi guys. Straight to the change room she did go. Only minutes later, she emerged ready for battle, with her Top Pair protected and in uniform.

Once Captain Otis arrived, it was time to fill out our roster. “What are you good at Bam?” he asked. “Uh….. I’m a drinker.” I said in my best Captain Obvious voice. “Right! Irish Car Bomb it is then.” He said with a smile. “Oh and since you’re Canadians, you and Peb’s both play the Air Hockey.” That seemed pretty natural to me. So we were all set for our events. Then Otis walked by and added Pinball to both of our events as well. I looked over at the machines and noticed that the Pinball event would be played on the Sopranos machine. NICE !!! Peb’s asked me if I wanted to play a warm up game and I told her, “Honey, it’s like ridin’ a bike. If I can’t just jump on that thing and break 13,000,000 for old times sake, I’ll stop drinking the rest of the weekend!”

It was at that time, that Recess and Riggs were gathering up something and heading past us to go outside. I asked them what they were up to, and Recess turned around and replied, “Fuel proofing the games, just in case!” I had no idea what that meant, so I tagged along. Ah…. A picture is worth a 1000 words indeed!

So with our events set, there was some time for a little mingling with some friends. There was a Bracelet sighting and short discussion, which was very enjoyable. The largest crowd all of the early afternoon, could be found around the Shuffleboard table. Peb’s and I hung out there for the most part. The crowd changed in eclectic ways, as two would leave and two more would take their place. At times it was like an entire shift change at the blogger factory, as 10 of us would wander off, only to be replaced by 10 or 12 more. Everyone floating from one piece of apparatus to another, all in anticipation of the events to come. Some were taking this Pub Olympics thing very seriously, others, not so much! But everyone was having fun, there was no doubt about that. The laughter and cries of “SHIP IT BITCH!” or “NOOOOOOO” would hit deep into your chest, not unlike the deepest bass at an Arena performance by Metallica. Yes at times, it was THAT loud in there. But at one point it became very evident, the Pub Olympics were about to get underway. A hush fell upon the crowd, as Captain Otis and Captain Al, were clearly gathering up their first competitors. It was on!

I drew Landow as my competition in the Air Hockey. It went back and forth, one goal after another. We smashed and swung and saved and shot that little green puck like two men on a mission. Our mission was clear and there were two primary objectives! First and foremost, win one for the team. But almost as importantly, try and hit Buddy Dank Radio with the puck! This would prove difficult but NOT impossible for me, as Buddy was directly behind me. After Landow drove one off the side of the table and skipped it off of Buddy’s shoulder, I was now in “The Dank” position in hits. I gathered myself up and started to work out my plan. It would take everything to go just right, if I was to tie this game up. I took a deep breath, (I’d seen some Olympians do that before, figured it’d help) and focused on my target. There it was, my one solid opportunity was right there in front of me. The time was now and SMASH ! went the puck of the backboard at Landow’s left wrist. It cam flying back towards me with what looked like perfect trajectory at first, but it was flipping ever so slightly. I let it go, this was my only chance. I twisted at the torso and my eyes caught Buddy just in time, to see the puck hit him in the chest. Score one for the good guys ! ;) Oh in the actual Air Hockey game itself, I scored 7 and Landow scored 2. But the score was 5-4 for Landow. Yes! He made 2 great direct shots for goals, and I put 3 in my own net. I run goot!

Next up for me was Pinball against a formidable opponent in VinNay. VinNay was one that I had seen at The Sopranos machine before. I also heard him ask someone earlier, “The Sopranos machine? Nice!” I figured I’d better get my game face on. So I went to the bar to find it. I had not even made it to within ten feet of the bar and there was the lovely Ashley. Just standing there with a Scotch and a pint of Yuengling waiting for me. Have I told you how great she is? Well it doesn’t matter, I’m telling you again. The girl has talent, looks and I loved spending time with her on both sides of the bar! Anywho… back to Pinball. My strategy on The Sopranos machine has always been the same. There’s some big points up top, so keep the ball up there AND, get the second ball in play. That’s what I did. I had a decent game considering it’s been some… well… we’ll leave it at 'some' years, since I played. I scored 14,850,590. I felt like I put up a score to beat. Then VinNay stepped up to the machine. I can’t watch at first, as I was dragged away for a shot and some pictures. Then Peb’s is up against Evy in the Air Hockey. So much going on! I hear a groan over at The Sopranos! “That’s got to be good,” I actually said out loud. Peb’s was getting creamed! “GOOOO Peb’s” I screamed and that seemed to get others yelling it as well. To no avail, EVY was just too good! A deserved win that Pebbles would like to congratulate her on again.

Back at the machine, VinNay was still standing BUT! I saw the classic slam of the flipper buttons that just tells everyone around, that ball was just lost. He stepped back and turned to face me. He did not look exceptionally happy. I had hope maybe? 15,250,400 ! “I just beat you.” He said. “Lucky too! I lost my first two balls early.” All I could say was “WOW! That must’ve been one helluva third ball!” I put up a score and told my opponent to try and beat it and on this day, VinNay was king of The Sopranos. Well done Sir, very Well done!

By this time, the crowd was starting to gather in anticipation of the one event that had been talked about the most earlier on. There was trash talk, oh yes! There was a lot of trash talk indeed. It was time for Buck Hunter! The non-stop barrage of “COW!” or “Lemur!” as the combatants waged their private war on Water Buffalo, Lions, Cheetahs and other various wild game, did not seem to distract but empowered the Hunters along the way. The ROAR at the sight of a shot Cow would alternate between the two teams crowded around the machine. The hugs and high fives, the fist pumps and fist bumps, all of it a non-stop episode of bonding at it’s best. Shots went down the throat almost as fast as shots were being fired at the screen. It was an insane 20 minutes! Except for the Hunters and their respective Captains, I don’t think anyone around there cared who actually won. You felt like a winner yourself, just for being able to take part in it.

Team AlCantHang won the overall Pub Olympics and it was a deserved win. We’ll get’em next year and yadda-yadda-yadda, blah-blah-blah. I felt bad for Otis for not getting at least one win out of the two events I competed in, but I did give it my all. When I asked Otis about the Irish Car Bomb relay, he just looked up and said, “you don’t have to.” As I understand it, we were too far behind to catch up anyhow. What a shame, wasting my natural God given talent like that.

My overall impression of the inaugural Pub Olympics? I’d like to be stuck in them over and over again, like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.

This is going far too long already and I’ve left so much out! I guess we’ll have to cover The “BASH” part of The BASH tomorrow.

My sincerest thanks for dropping by….


Alan aka RecessRampage said...

Holy cow... I don't remember that sign AT ALL.

Riggstad said...


Drizztdj said...

Cows are rigged.

Evy said...


Wolfshead said...


not sure if I met you on Friday but tell Pebbles that the marriage offer is still open even if it was made in the haze of sake and beer and under the influence of a fantastic neck rub.

Seriously, had a great time and hope to see more of you folks.