For those of you that have stopped by here for the last three or more years, or those of you that have known me longer than that, you know something about my brudder CC. I actually created the word "brudder" just for him. It was stronger and yet more fun than brother. It was unique and laughable, yet still got the point across.

"True friends, are family you get to choose."

*Sept. 17, 2004

Few "brudders" have come my way since CC. I have hundreds of "brothers" and "sisters" and as I've always been happy to say, I run pretty damn good in the friends department.

But there's something pretty special about those that fill the "brudder" moniker. A feeling that is shared between two, three or four, yet felt by everyone in any environment these "brudders" happen to be inhabiting.

"Brudders" exude an emotion slightly stronger than joy, just a tad below orgasm and yet to those around when they're lucky enough, both are totally achievable at the time.

"Brudders" had to come from somewhere and for me, it's who you are and how you were brought up. The "bringing up" part is a blend of friendships, schooling and most importantly, how you were raised by your parents. This is no "Dad-ism" or Bam-Bam says so BS. This is quite simply a fact of life, at least as I know it. We are what we are through experience, judgement, mistakes and lessons learned. The vast majority of each of those, a culmination of messages put between our ears by our parents. For good or for bad we are what we are because of our upbringing and parenting roots that were planted very early on. Then again and again, as the seeds for our lives were planted repeatedly throughout.

There were my cabbage rolls vs. her meat on a stick.
My adoration of my wife vs. her calling Peb's "quite simply, the most beautiful natural woman on the planet.
My love for her vs. her love for me.
My love for her son as a "brudder" vs. well, let's just say it paled in comparison.

For five years now we've all done what we could, to help Fred battle the insanity that is Cancer and all the while, she would've done anything she could to help make it an easier journey for us all.

It was just a one sentence email.

~Mom just lost her fight against Cancer.

But I cried for hours.

Yesterday morning my brudder CC, lost his Mom.

I know for a fact that the hole in my heart right now truly pales in comparison, to the hole in this world left behind, from a truly remarkable woman.

R.I.P. Kate.
You were and always shall be, truly loved.

My sincerest thanks for dropping by....


Josie said...

So sorry for the circumstances that prompted you to write this most amazing post. You're a great guy Bammer.

gadzooks64 said...

So sorry for your (and CC's) loss.

DrChako said...

Happy to consider myself in the brudder group. So sad for the loss.


Riggstad said...

What Doc Said

see you soon brudder!

lightning36 said...

Sorry to hear of your loss.

"A heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others."

The Wizard of Oz