The funny thing about Doctors....

Despite knowing one or two exceptional Doctors in their field, I'll do damn near anything in my power to avoid seeing them on any kind of professional level. Staying away from any Doctor in their natural working environment, is just how I try to roll. Because the one constant in the universe that shall never change no matter what, is if you give a Doctor an opportunity to find something wrong with you, they probably will!

Part of the equation also seems to include the fact, that they know you don't get in to see them very often. You can actually see it in their eyes as they read the chart. It's as if they can't believe no one but them has had the chance to violate and investigate some type of virginal flesh. This is always followed by, "we'll have to set you up with a barrage of tests. Just to see what's really going on with you Mr. Bammer."

So here I sit, cheap plastic bracelet with all of my vital statistics on the left wrist. Wondering to myself, how is it that so many parts of my body can be violated for some type of sample or another? Why would so many blood samples be required? Can all of the different ghouls requiring my blood, not just do all the tests they need to together?

Why the hell would you need a swab from inside there?

Pee in a bottle sure! But THAT my very well, if not over-educated young lady, is NOT a bottle! Oh a pill bottle maybe, but definitely not what came to mind upon your request!

What does the fluid from my eye have to do with anything?

Yes my blood pressure is fluctuating! Wouldn't yours, if you were in here for so long that you know everyone on both the Day AND Afternoon shifts?

I didn't go to school for all of this crap like you guy's, but it would seem to me that if you planned, (or even thought there was a remote chance) of taking another blood sample, you might have wanted to just tape down that original needle at the time.

Yes thank you, I am very hungry. An IV drip should do just the trick! YUM !!!

It's not serious but, I'll be damned if I don't have ten different things wrong with me after this latest little "check-up." Suddenly I have pills to take that no less than three Doctors have no idea, how I ever lived without taking them before.

This "check-up" also spawned three new appointments over the next few weeks to, "get things back on track."


With all due respect to those I do know, I'd rather live without'em.

= = = = = =

Unfortunately this weeks Frantic Friday has been put on hold. I apologise to everyone for the delay, but it appears that pretty constant horizontal positioning will be taking over my immediate future.

I can't take an Aspirin without coming to a crashing halt and instantaneous sleep. I can't imagine what the hell this pharmaceutical salad of pills & caplets is going to do to me. Sianara for now all. We'll see you on the other side of Easter.

Be good to the Bunny! Remember, he does all this without magic flying reindeer and a sled of any kind! Now THAT's impressive!


My sincerest thanks for dropping by....


DrChako said...

Let me know if you need a 2nd opinion.


BadBlood said...

"Get well" soon, whatever the hell is wrong with you...... :)

Baywolfe said...

Syonara, Amigo! (how's that for mixed languages?)

We have got to get together over a table one of these days.

KenP said...

Are you my evil clone? Had to go for a blood 'workup' this A.M. No food allowed. Got to the one place and the morbidly obese lady was taking care of someone. She can barely walk and the printer is across the room. Painful to watch.

Meantime, two others not in her department were sitting before their monitors chatting and doing their nails. She finally comes out and takes the other guy. I ask for my little ticket back and leave.

Next place I fill out a sheet and get a beeper. I stand around and then ask how long. The girl tells me they need to check out Medicare. They don't have my account number but I am supposed to wait. One more ticket returned.

It is all about captive audiences. Leaves you without any clout. Any second year business student could set up a better system and make people happier in the process -- employees and clients. More would get done and employees might get a sense of worth.

lightning36 said...

No Frantic Friday? Get your priorities straight, my man.